Anatomical confusion

***gross post****

(Just cause I know that there is someone out there reading this...)

Anyways.

I'm petrified of the phenomenon known as "skeeting".

Whenever it's about to happen, I stop myself (yeah, talkin about battery luv again. Ain't nan nigga out there that has made me get to THAT point, although the ex was damn, damn close). I usually freak out because I think I'm gonna piss on myself or something.

I wish there was like a manual on that shit... because psychologically I can't convince myself that it's an okay thing. I swear, I freak out. Because it's not a small amount... ever. The shit is major. And although it feels great, something keeps sayin, "stop heffa, you're gonna piss on yourself". That shit sucks. Because if I could just quit freaking out and let go, I'd have reached the pussy pinnacle. But NOOO. I'm a prude. A scary prude at that.

I wonder is there anyone else out there as confused as my black ass. I'm the only damn person in the world that could be conflicted about that. Most folks would probably be like, so what? But I have a REAL problem with folks peeing on themselves... so there's no way I can do that or obviously anything that is remniscent of me pissing myself.

Even if sexual nirvana lies within.

Lawd I'm one screwed up chick, lol. Fuck. I'mma go find my physiology book.