WTF...

I've posted more here today than at my other blog. That is strange. But then thats what this one's for; all the stuff I dont wanna put in the other one.

Now I'm struggling with the so-called un-crush again. I have a lot of time on my hands, and folks I could be conversing with via AIM. But I dont dare go back on because he may be there. And considering how I can't keep a damn thing to myself lately, I don't need to talk to him right now. He's not the person I wanna say, "hey, you know what? I'd fuck the shit outta you" to. He's not all perverted and shit. So it wouldn't do me any good to say that to him. So I'm not going on AIM until I get home. Maybe the hormones will have calmed down by then.

I'm going to overcome this bullshit, one way or another. I'm not gonna give my ex any ass, I'm not making any phone calls, and I'm not gonna solicit the un-crush either. I'm gonna be a big girl, and act my damn age.

I mean, I'm a grown ass woman. I get reduced rate car insurance, for crying out loud. So why am I having all these juvenile, hormonal malfunctions? This shit is ridiculous. I want my regular old grumpy life back. I dont wanna think about him when I listen to my damn Usher CD that I bought before I even knew him. I can deal with lingering memories of the ex, because that nigga put it on me something too fierce. But this dude ain't put NOTHING on me. So I dont want to think about him. This is some shit, for real.

I just want to know when does it end.

I'm glad blogging is free because I know I'd be getting on SOMEONE'S nerves right now if I couldn't clear my mind of this shit. Lemme get back to work.